What's more, your own body language, as a leader, can either enhance or undermine how you are viewed. Positive body language can help leaders be more empathetic and establish better communication. It can strengthen the connection with employees and inspire trust.

To get some tips on effective non-verbal leadership communication, I spoke with Joe Navarro, ex-FBI special agent and one of the world's leading experts on non-verbal communication. Navarro is now an instructor and private consultant to major corporations. He is the best-selling author of over 14 books, including his latest, "Be Exceptional: Master the Five Traits That Set Extraordinary People Apart." I was just as thrilled to speak with Anne-Maartje Oud, CEO and Founder of The Behaviour Company and body language expert.

What Is Non-verbal Communication?

"Non-verbal communication," says Navarro, "is anything that communicates a message but is not a word." It's everything from our facial expressions and gestures, to what we wear, to how well we are groomed.

Even good manners constitute non-verbal body language, Navarro says. "So things such as:

• opening the door for others.
• using a good tone of voice. 
• smiling. 
• being kind. 

"These are all forms of non-verbals, and these are power to businesspeople. Never underestimate the power of being kind and liking others. Period."

You are always on display as a leader, whether in a one-on-one meeting or when virtually presenting to large groups. As Navarro explains, our body language constantly transmits information about our thoughts, feelings and intentions.

How to Improve Non-verbal Communication

Being conscious of the non-verbal messages we send is essential. For one thing, this awareness will help us ensure that our body language matches our words. It will also help us avoid negative body language that could make us appear unfriendly or lacking confidence.

To get you started on improving your non-verbal communication, try these tips from Navarro:

Take Your Time

"One of the things we understand universally," says Navarro, "is that a leader exercises control by how they enter a room, how they look around, and so forth. And, of course, how they dress and the manner in which they walk and carry themselves.

"Leaders don't do anything hurriedly. They don't have to. They're leaders. So, we say that they have temporal control.

"One of the things we see over and over in leadership," adds Navarro, "is this way you carry yourself where you don't have to hurry." 

Use Cadence

Navarro says another way leaders exercise temporal control is that "they take the time to meet and greet everybody, to make good solid eye contact with them. And then they deliver their message. They exercise what we call 'temporal control,' which is they use cadence."

I asked him to give an example of leaders using cadence. "Winston Churchill used this brilliantly," he replied. "Martin Luther King was also exceptional in using cadence. And we saw it also with Abraham Lincoln when he gave the Gettysburg Speech:

Four score and seven years ago, [pause]. 

Our forefathers brought forth upon this continent a new nation, [pause]. 

"Because you're speaking in cadence," explains Navarro, "you're taking up time and the person that controls time, in essence, controls." 

Navarro concludes by saying that "these are things that a leader can use and demonstrate, and in so doing, a leader is communicating that they're in charge because they're not in a hurry. Because they can take their time walking in, walking about, and dominating the conversation by speaking in tones that demonstrate that time is theirs. And, of course, speaking in cadence beautifully controls the attention and time." 

However, your body language shouldn't always be the same for every person you talk to in every conversation. Just like verbal communication, you should tailor your non-verbal communication to fit the context. Here are a couple of examples where some nuance is needed:

Body Language When Navigating a Difficult Conversation With an Employee

Conducting an effective difficult conversation with an employee is a critical leadership competence. You may need to give a negative performance review, deliver stern feedback, or reset an employee's expectations. 

So how can body language help you to handle these difficult conversations successfully?

"That's a great question. First of all," says Navarro, "you have to have boundaries. You have to demonstrate that you are, in fact, a leader, but you are willing to listen. And listen as long as it takes so that the person feels that their message is being received and that they have their say." 

Navarro emphasizes that it's essential to be direct, not fidgeting. "Just think about what you need to say in advance and then just say it. And if you have to tell someone they're being put on notice because they're failing in their task, then you just lay it out, just like that." 

I asked Oud to elaborate on any body language cues a leader should give when handling a difficult conversation with an employee. 

"It depends," replied Oud, "on if the conversation is difficult for you as a leader (maybe you are new to this kind of conversation on how to give constructive feedback) or if the difficulty is there for the employee." 

This is an important distinction. We explored how a leader can make an employee feel comfortable during a difficult conversation.

"Being a good listener helps. Listening is key," explains Oud. "Also, ensure that your posture, gestures and voice are not antagonistic. We can be empathetic with our gestures but also firm with boundaries." 

Our message must be plain and understandable, stresses Oud, "and supported by congruent behavior: a straight posture, a clear voice and good eye contact. Use your eyes to gaze as you listen but not stare with acrimony." 

According to Oud, it also helps to validate the fears and apprehensions of others. "In the end, the message must be conveyed as humanely as possible." 

Body Language When Communicating With a Neurodivergent Employee

Neurodivergent people have a brain that works differently from the average or "neurotypical" person. This includes differences in ways of learning, ways of communicating, or ways of perceiving the environment. 

Should leaders adapt their body language and communication style when talking to neurodivergent employees?

Oud says: "Adaptation is key for anyone who wants to communicate effectively. As a leader, you should observe and understand how you can create comfort during your conversation to help others, yourself and the company achieve the goals ahead." 

"Neurodiversity," she adds, "is such a broad category that may require standing further away or perhaps making less eye contact, slowing down how fast you speak, or changing the tone of voice. Observation is key to determining what will make the other person or team more psychologically comfortable and how to act accordingly."

Focusing on what makes a person more psychologically comfortable ties in with an important principle Joe Navarro talks about: the importance of observing people's signs of "comfort" and "discomfort."

Focusing on these two behavioral clues will give you the necessary information to help you adapt your approach accordingly. It will yield powerful insights that can make you a more effective communicator. Asking yourself, "Are people comfortable or uncomfortable?" is one of the top ways of becoming body-language smart.

Taking Control of Your Body Language

When we seek to learn about body language, many of us look for tips on detecting deception or projecting power. But the overarching message I have gotten from Joe Navarro and Anne-Maartje Oud is to focus instead on observing the signs of comfort or discomfort in others. Using these cues to modify your body language so that others feel at ease around you is a surefire way to become a better communicator and achieve greater success in your interaction.

Discover more about using body language to communicate more effectively, with our recommended resources:

Body Language
Adapting Your Communication Style Video
Body Language Battle Video
What Every BODY Is Saying
5 Moves to Master Body Language Infographic

About the Author:

Bruna is an educator, author and speaker specializing in emotional intelligence, leadership, communication, and presentation-skills training.

The post How to Use Body Language to Be a Better Leader – Tips From the Experts! appeared first on Mind Tools.

So what is coaching, exactly? And how does it differ from mentoring? Well, we have a video on exactly this topic – but, put simply, coaching is the art of getting people to help themselves. Where a mentor might tell you what to do, a coach will listen, reflect, and ask questions. In this way, they elicit ideas from the coachee – who ultimately finds their own answers.

"Coaching is unlocking a person's potential to maximize their own performance. It is helping them to learn rather than teaching them."

Timothy Gallwey, author and coach.

Coaching Videos

Coaching is a formal pursuit – but, increasingly, coaching skills are being used by managers and leaders to help them develop and look after their people. And an informal, everyday approach to coaching is gaining currency, too.

At Mind Tools, we've noticed that. And in our brand-new batch of videos, we focus on coaching skills – to show you the ropes, and to make coaching part of your everyday approach to management.

What Is Coaching?

The first of our six coaching videos, How to Be a Workplace Coach, introduces the concept of coaching and offers seven rules to get you started. From confidentiality to the types of questions you should ask, this video is a perfect first step into the world of coaching.

There are many potential pitfalls with coaching. Our video Coaching Conversations: Dos and Don'ts helps you to avoid the common traps and have great conversations. Maybe you think it makes sense to have a set checklist of questions. No: that's a don't! It's crucial that a coaching conversation flows naturally: a checklist will create a more stilted, formal atmosphere. Broad or specific, the dos and don'ts in this video apply to any and every coaching conversation.

When to Coach

Coaching doesn't need to be a scheduled, orchestrated, formal event. In fact, coaching often works best "in-the-moment," when people are experiencing work-related challenges. Our video Informal Coaching shows how you can coach over a cup of coffee or in the hallway between meetings. In this video there's also an example scenario, so you can see what informal coaching looks like in action!

Coaching is also a great way to lead people through organizational changes. If you're a leader, it's your responsibility to guide people through change to reach the new status quo. Change can be tough. But, with coaching, you can make the process smoother and, ultimately, more successful. Our new video Coaching Through Change shows you how it's done. And that one features a scenario, too! You can see the principles put into practice in a difficult management situation.

Coaching Tools

As a manager, you have plenty of opportunities to employ coaching methods and tools as part of nurturing your team.

The POSITIVE Model of Coaching is a great way to set and monitor team goals. It uses an eight-step framework that encourages coachees to adopt energizing, exciting goals – and shows how you, the coach, can do your bit to encourage them.

People you coach will be at different levels of ability and determination. Someone with low skill and high enthusiasm will need a different approach from that of someone who's highly skilled but lacks direction. The Skill/Will Matrix Video helps you to decide how to pitch your input with your coachee depending on their skill and will. It's a brilliant and simple tool for fine-tuning your approach to coaching.

The post Get Coaching – Introducing Brand-New Mind Tools Coaching Videos appeared first on Mind Tools.

The news comes less than one month after Jacinda Ardern announced that she would step down as PM of New Zealand. In her six years running the country, Ardern was praised for her strong but compassionate leadership style, proving that kindness and humility are assets to any leader.

With these two strong female politicians stepping down, I wanted to reflect on how kindness and humility can help us to become better leaders, and why stepping aside is not a sign of weakness.

What Is Humility?

Humility is the opposite of bragging. It's staying modest about yourself and your status. But don't confuse humility with low self-esteem; it doesn't mean that you're insecure or lack confidence, but rather that you appreciate your talents without being boastful. Leadership expert Bruna Martinuzzi writes about Humility as "a quiet confidence."

When we're less preoccupied with our own accomplishments, we have more time and energy to think about others. Humility is therefore a highly desirable trait in any leader, since it ensures that they will always act in the best interests of their team, rather than for their own personal gain.

Do Female Leaders Show More Humility?

Author of "The Paula Principle," Tom Schuller, finds that men often work above their level of competence, but women are more likely to work below their level of competence. Tomas Charmarro-Premuzic has also written about this, citing that "women are more sensitive, considerate and humble than men."

But everyone can develop kindness and selflessness, and these qualities are even more valuable in leadership roles.

Traits of a Kind Leader

Humility is just one of the key ingredients that make up a kind leader. And with a little practice you too can develop a more compassionate leadership style:

• Active listening. As a leader, your voice will often carry the most weight in your team. Give others a chance to voice their ideas and pay attention to what they have to say.
• Empathy. Connect with your team members. Try to understand their feelings and points of view. How does their work affect their wellbeing? And what can you do to help?
• Self-awareness. What kind of leader are you? What does your team think of you? A self-reflection will help you to stay grounded and understand your motives.
• Trust and honesty. A kind leader will trust and empower their team. To nurture a culture of trust, you should be honest and authentic with your co-workers. If you set a good example, your team will follow suit!
• Accountability. As leader, the buck stops with you. Kind leaders demonstrate courage and tenacity by accepting responsibility for their decisions and learning from their mistakes.

A Kind Leader Knows When to Step Aside

Resigning because you don't feel up to the task at hand is commonly seen as a weakness, but it's quite the opposite.

Sturgeon and Ardern's reasons for handing over the prime ministerial baton demonstrate kindness and strength. Not only to themselves, but also to their people. Knowing when you've reached your limit is an admirable trait, and admitting it takes a wealth of courage.

Rather than try to "fake it 'til you make it," a good leader can admit when they aren't the right person for the job. For example, asking for help or delegating to team members with more suitable skillsets. Or, in the case of Jacinda Arden and Nicola Sturgeon, stepping down for the sake of the people they represent.

A kind and humble person won't let their vanity or desire for personal glory stand in the way of their team's success.

Beware of Generosity Burnout!

Leading with kindness and humility can be wearing. Especially in politics! With so many people depending on you to guide them in the right direction, it can be difficult to make both quick and ethical decisions. This pressure, and the constant consideration of others' needs over your own can lead to generosity burnout.

In her resignation speech, Jacinda Ardern admitted that she simply did not "have enough in the tank" to continue in her role. Giving too much too often will inevitably lead to exhaustion and burnout. Generosity burnout can even make you resent those who depend on you, so it's crucial to do something about it before it takes hold.

Avoid generosity burnout as a leader by accepting that you can't always please everyone. Reflect on your personal values and those of your company, and consider how you can apply them in your decision making. This will help you to feel confident about the choices you make, and defend them if you face scrutiny.

Finally, take time for yourself. While you are responsible for your people, you can't help them to be their best selves if you you don't show yourself the same care and attention!

The post Leading With Kindness and Humility appeared first on Mind Tools.

Today, more than ever, ethics are a leadership imperative. Ethical leaders rise above the din of the crowd to inspire us at a time of uncertainty and large-scale corporate cases of fraud and unethical behavior in organizations.

It's not surprising that in a 2021 Gallup poll, both Generation Z and millennials rated ethical leadership highly.

Ethics are a key value for these generations, in particular. A recent Deloitte survey reveals that nearly 37 percent of Gen Zs, and 36 percent of millennials, have rejected a job and assignment based on their personal ethics. Moreover, almost half of all Gen Zs and millennials in senior positions have declined positions and projects that did not conform with their values and ethics.

Gen Z and millennials currently account for approximately 38 percent of the global workforce. They will increase to about 58 percent by 2030, making these upcoming younger generations the most dominant in the workplace in less than ten years' time.

When it comes to ethical leadership, how ready is your organization to attract and retain this talent pool?

What Is a Definition of an Ethical Organization?

Simply put, an organization that practices ethical leadership is where all those in management and leadership positions set an example of ethical conduct in their everyday actions and relationships.

What Is the Impact of Ethical Leadership?

A 2021 survey by LRN, based on data collected from 8,000 employees worldwide representing 17 industries, showed that companies with the strongest ethical cultures outperform their peers by 40 percent across all measures of business performance. A company's ethics are only as good as its leaders. Ethical leaders:

• Establish an ethical culture in an organization.
• Attract the best employees.
• Inspire employee loyalty.
• Increase investor confidence and trust in a company.
• Engender customer loyalty.
• Garner positive press.
• Attract the best vendors.
• Help boost the bottom line.

The Dangers of Having Non-Ethical Leaders

We've all read about significant unethical behaviors that become headlines, from bank employees creating fake profiles to file fraudulent applications to government relief programs, to a major car company cheating on emissions tests. While these are significant cases that may seem far removed from our daily life, how about the small acts of unethical behavior right on our doorsteps?

Let me count the ways:

• Cheating on expense reimbursements.
• Stealing company stationery items.
• Altering a timesheet.
• Taking credit for someone else's work.
• Doing work that isn't related to the office during office hours.
• Sidelining a deserving employee as a result of nepotism.

Unethical leadership spreads like a virus, infecting employees at all levels. Unethical leaders breed dishonest employees. For example, a manager seen stealing company products influences other employees to do the same.

Numerous studies show the devastating effects of unethical leadership on employees and organizations. These include poor employee performance, negative attitudes, anxieties, frustration, motivational decline, loss of trust toward the leaders, work alienation, and related negative consequences for employees' private lives, to name a few.

Can an Inspirational Ethical Leader Turn an Unethical Culture Around?

We all want to work for ethical organizations. But it may be unrealistic to expect all organizations to do the right thing consistently in a tumultuous world.

A coaching client of mine once lamented that he'd unintentionally found himself working in an environment where some parts of the company weren't operating ethically.

So, what do you do in this case?

First, it's essential to understand that if you work for an unethical organization, you're walking a fine line between corporate ethical responsibility and individual responsibility, especially if you're a manager or leader in the organization. Regardless of what goes on around you, have your own code of conduct and let people know what you stand for. Build a good reputation for honesty by consistently doing what you say you will do.

You also want to attract positive attention to yourself by honing your leadership skills and developing your leadership presence. Consider these points to help you raise your leadership profile:

• Enhance your presentation and facilitation skills and learn how to chair a meeting with savvy.
• Raise the bar on your communication skills. Speak as a leader. Don't just deliver the facts – learn to inspire your listeners through storytelling and metaphors.
• Work on building rapport with higher-ups and colleagues. Allow them to get to know you.
• Put effort into becoming an expert in your area of responsibility. Being regarded as an expert confers a leadership status and is crucial in influencing others.

While you may not be able to turn the entire organization's culture around, you can, by example, impact the culture of your own team or department positively.

At a minimum, your leadership presence will be noticed and can influence others, starting with those closest to you on your team. Modeling the way can have a ripple effect in one department and, with time, could influence other areas of the organization.

Consider as well that unethical leaders are eventually ousted. That's when senior leaders look around for a suitable replacement. If you've consistently shown up as an ethical leader and have worked on your leadership skills, chances are you'll be on the radar of the powers that be.

This is what happened to Vivian (not her real name). Vivian reported to Ken, a self-interested and arrogant senior leader. Ken initially got away with many infractions, including inappropriate use of corporate funds, such as expensing massages for his wife at the country club. Other instances included giving preference to hiring his daughters as summer interns, altering numbers in reports, and asking subordinates to cut corners by skipping standard procedures. But he tipped the scale when he cut a deal with a vendor for personal financial gain. When he was fired, the company replaced him with Vivian, who'd made inroads by showing leadership at every touchpoint. People notice those who stand out as ethical leaders.

Final Thoughts on Ethical Leadership

Author Zig Ziglar once said, "Live in such a way that if someone spoke badly of you, no one would believe it." Your reputation and ethics go hand in hand – even the slightest unintentional ethical lapse can harm your leadership.

To be considered an ethical leader who inspires and positively impacts the culture, you must guard your reputation with your life. Your reputation is your passport to ethical leadership.

About the Author:

Bruna is an educator, author and speaker specializing in emotional intelligence, leadership, communication, and presentation-skills training.

The post The Power of an Ethical Leader appeared first on Mind Tools.

Maybe that's why business writers reach so readily for sporting metaphors. Sport and business seem to have much in common. They both value competition, leadership, strategy, and tactics. Articles about the motivational skills and tactical know-how of elite coaches are everywhere. And they're often in highbrow business publications.

But not everyone agrees that sport and business make such a great match. In his 2017 Harvard Business Review article, Bill Taylor took aim at some of these assumptions, and pointed out a couple of major league differences:

1: There Can Only Be One Winner in Sports

Sports are usually zero-sum. There are winners and losers. Even in sports that allow for ties, like soccer, there's only one champion in the end.

Taylor points out that business isn't like that, and certainly shouldn't be. In any industry, there are opportunities for a wide range of different organizations. And the ones that succeed will be the ones that focus first on their customers, not their competitors.

2: Sports... No I in Team?

What about the talent? Taylor characterizes the elite sports locker room as "a collection of mercenaries ruled by a tyrant." It's a harsh verdict, but self-interest is inevitable. The average NFL career is less than three years. Players have to look after number one, even in a collaborative setting.

Add to this the fact that in team sports, most customers – the fans – actively dislike their team's CEO and management most of the time.

Sounds like a pretty toxic mix for any business, even one that commands unusual levels of customer loyalty.

A Coach's View

But does it have to be this way? After all, Taylor is talking about elite sports, played and run by millionaires. What about the grass roots?

We asked Simon Hulcoop about that. Simon is Mind Tools' Head of Sales for Europe, the Middle East and Africa. He's a busy man, but, in his spare time, he coaches Southwater Royals, an under-14 girls' soccer team, and a "Wildcats" group aged five to 11.

So you coach a young women's football team. What's that like?

"Seeing them grow, develop and have fun playing football with their friends is something I really enjoy. One of the best parts of the role is seeing them come together as a team and support each other.

"It's also great to see them put into practice the things we've worked on and talked about during training. I'm lucky enough to have a fantastic bunch of girls that listen and give 100 percent in every game, which is fantastic to see!"

What skills do you need to be a successful sports coach?

"Good leadership skills, the ability to stay calm, and patience. You need to adapt to the different ways your players listen and learn, communicate clearly and, most importantly for me, always be passionate and positive!

"Being someone the team looks up to and respects is important too. You're the key person, communicating instructions and sometimes making difficult decisions. So you need to be someone they trust."

Has your role as football coach taught you anything that has been useful in your career?

"Never give up and keep working hard. On several occasions the girls have been losing and come back to win the game. So we might have tried different formations or instructions from the sidelines.

"It's the same in the workplace. I've hit stumbling blocks with deals or not been able to get through to the right people. But being patient and working hard always pays off."

Do you use the same coaching style to guide both of your teams, or different approaches?

"There are a lot of similarities. One of the biggest things is to be adaptable. Whether they're an adult or 13-year-old girl, everyone learns in different ways. So you need to adapt your approach.

"Also, listening and providing feedback are key skills in both. I don't always give them the answer. I guide them through the problem or challenge, whether that's a tactical soccer problem, or responding to objections about a product after a sales call."

What's more rewarding – your football team winning a big game, or your sales team winning a big client?

"I'm competitive, so both of those are up there for me. Actually for some of the same reasons.

"The joy on the players' faces when they've won a big game, and the grin of a salesperson when they close a deal – for me both are rewarding. But I might shout a little louder when the team wins a match!"

Bill Taylor's article claims business has little to learn from sports about competition and success, from talent and teamwork, value and values. What's your take on that?

"I believe that sports – especially soccer – teach us a lot that we can take into other areas of life. Being able to fail, and learn from setbacks, is one of the biggest for me. My team has learned so much from losing tight games against good teams. They've gone on to be stronger. If it's too easy, you learn nothing.

"Teamwork is another big one. Sport really encourages collaboration, another important skill to have and use throughout your life.

"Finally, one of the biggest things I've seen sport do is build self-confidence. Many girls come to the club nervous and lacking belief. But, through coaching and positive feedback, they end up loving the game, and booming with confidence. You need to be confident in different ways and at different times throughout your life, so this is a big positive."

Sports: More Than Just Games People Play

So there you have it. Elite sport and grassroots sport inhabit different worlds. One's cutthroat and zero-sum; the other's full of positives for learning, resilience, collaboration, and self-confidence.

Well, maybe. How about this: "We really analyze our opponents and talk about what their patterns, strengths and weaknesses are, if they have any. Then we say, 'What are our strengths? What do we need to do to harm them?'"

Analysis, collaboration, communication, self-confidence. That's Sarina Wiegman, coach of the England Women's Soccer Team. In July, they became the European Champions. It's an achievement that still eludes their male counterparts.

So perhaps elite sport doesn't have to be the way Bill Taylor describes it – particularly if it's played by women. Maybe it does still have some value for business leaders.

For a further angle on this, check out "Winning Together" by Helen and Kate Richardson-Walsh. It's a book with plenty to say about team building, collaboration, confidence – and winning.

And if you're keen to find out more about effective coaching, read our other blog, "What Makes a Great Coach? – 5 Essential Qualities."

What lessons, if any, can business learn from sports? Share your thoughts and experiences below!

The post Sports Coaching Business Lessons appeared first on Mind Tools.

The book, "Return on Character," says it can. And its author, the academic and consultant Fred Kiel, has found a way to calculate the impact of a leader’s character on the financial performance of their company. His research team carried out a seven-year study into this topic and the results are fascinating.

Everyday Character at Work

Imagine... You sense a warm, positive buzz in a certain café, where the baristas are relaxed, good humored, and attentive. Then you meet the manager and – surprise! – she exudes a warm, friendly calm. She involves her team in decision making and she respects their skills and experience. Meanwhile, in the store next door, resentful employees listlessly stack shelves, under the steely eye of their grumpy boss.

But is this just about personalities? When I met Kiel to record my Mind Tools Expert Interview podcast, I began with the basics. What does a leader of good character look like?

Members of the Mind Tools Club can hear the full interview. If you're not already signed up, read on here for a taster...

What Is Good Character?

Fred Kiel asserts that a leader of good character tells the truth. Further, "They keep their promises. They stand up for what’s right, and then they have a certain humility about them, where they own up to their own mistakes and accept the consequences.

"They tend to look first at what they did wrong, rather than what other people did wrong, and when other people make mistakes they tend to be curious rather than blaming and shaming. And then they treat you as a human being and not as an object."

In his groundbreaking study, Kiel set out to put a hard value on those admirable traits. The first step was to ask the 84 CEOs participating in the study to rate themselves against four defining characteristics: integrity, compassion, forgiveness, and responsibility. Then their employees were asked to rate these leaders against the same characteristics, to provide objectivity and perspective.

Character Study

From this data, the CEOs were given scores relating to their leadership behavior. The most highly principled leaders were labeled "virtuoso CEOs," while those at the other end of the spectrum were called "self-focused CEOs."

The research team then cross-referenced these character scores with the financial results of the leaders’ companies. It discovered that the virtuoso CEOs achieved nearly five times greater return on assets than their low-ranking counterparts.

An Invitation to Change

It’s a remarkable finding, but what can we do with this information, given that leopards don’t change their spots? Once a self-focused CEO, always a self-focused CEO, right? Wrong, says Kiel. It may not be easy, but leaders can move from one end of the spectrum to the other.

In "Return on Character," Kiel outlines this process of personal change. He sees it as a six-part journey, starting with "invitations to change." As an example of this step, he talks about a young executive who effortlessly rose through the ranks of a company and assumed he was next in line to be named president of a major business unit.

"His invitation for change, or wake-up call, came when the CEO invited him into his office. He came in expecting to get the good news and instead he was told, ‘I’m sorry, but I’m not giving you this job. I’m giving it to your peer instead.’ And that was a very traumatic event for him because he’d never had a failure experience to deal with before. So that became a real invitation for him to change."

The other five steps to becoming a virtuoso leader require just as much humility and self-awareness, with the final one, "rewire your brain," designed to cement new good habits through focus and practice.

Completing all six steps in this process is a major undertaking, but no doubt worth it, on a personal and organizational level, for under-performing leaders.

What about those leaders who don’t need, or want, to undergo large-scale personal change, but would still like to maximize their return on character? Kiel offers some useful tips in this audio clip from our Expert Interview podcast.

Listen to the full Expert Interview in the Mind Tools Club, or get a license for your organization through Mind Tools for Business.

So, Does Honesty Pay?

"Return on Character" is an absorbing read that shows leadership behavior can be linked to business results. Senior executives may well benefit from taking these ideas on board. But even if we’re not in charge of our company’s financial performance, we can still learn from the basic principle: it pays, literally, to be honest, compassionate and responsible.

What would you do to improve return on character, for yourself or your organization? Share your thoughts and experiences in the comments below.

The post Good Character in Business: My Interview With Fred Kiel appeared first on Mind Tools.

You call the office for advice, and it's your boss who picks up the phone.

What happens next?

A Lesson in Leadership

l was in that exact situation about thirty years ago, shortly after starting my first real job.

I'd been sent out in an unfamiliar company car, and for some reason I hadn't spotted that it was nearly out of gas. By the time it finally spluttered to a halt, I was on a deserted country road, night was falling, and there was no one around to help.

When my phone call was answered, and it was the manager of my team – a senior leader in the whole organization – my heart sank for a moment.

But instead of tearing into me, pointing out how stupid I'd been, or even just handing me off to someone else, John chuckled, told me not to worry, and asked how he could help.

A few minutes later he'd arranged for a local garage to come and refuel the car as soon as they could. And, to save me waiting, he'd set off on his motorbike to bring me home.

Leadership That Lasts

I learned a lot about John's leadership that night. Over the next few years, he further established himself as a great leader in my eyes – by what he did, but also by the sort of person he was.

And when I listened to our latest Expert Voices podcast this week, I recognized in John's personal attributes many of the leadership traits mentioned by our guests. The kinds of things that make you remember someone's leadership three decades on.

Lessons From Expert Voices

Mind Tools Expert Voices is the podcast series where we delve into our 200+ Expert Interviews, to explore a particular question or theme.

In episode four, "How to Be a Great Leader," my colleague Rachel Salaman gets insights and ideas from experts including Frances Frei, Ashley Goodall and Fred Kiel. They tell her what's special about the best leaders – and how we can be more like them.

A Servant Leader

In my moment of need, John helped. He did that by listening properly to what my problem was, talking to me about what he could do – and then doing it. It didn't matter that he was way above me in the company hierarchy, or that he had a hugely challenging and time-consuming job. When my call came in, I was his priority.

Leadership professor Sen Sendjaya calls this "servant leadership." It takes humility, the willingness to admit to your own mistakes, and the commitment to support your people to do their best. "It's not being inferior, but it's also not being superior," Sen tells Rachel in the podcast. Servant leaders know their own strengths and weaknesses. So they can also help others to understand theirs.

Leading by Example

John often deferred to people who were better at something than him. He gave us all appropriate opportunities to grow, and was happy for us to shine.

But he was also very good at the core aspects of his job. Executive coach Ashley Goodall highlights this as a key leadership trait. "You're following them because they're really good at something that you care about," he says of great leaders. "That removes a little bit of your doubt about the future, a little bit of your uncertainty."

A key part of John's leadership power was his consistency – another trait mentioned by many of our podcast guests. He was always calm in a crisis, and his down-to-earth approach to decision making meant that we all understood his thinking. We knew where we stood with him, whether it was a minor matter or something that would affect the whole business. In the words of leadership consultant Kate Sweetman, during some turbulent times, he was "one of those rocks you wish you had."

He wasn't a pushover, though. He made tough calls when he had to, and held us all accountable in our roles. But he did so in a relentlessly positive way – what Susan Scott calls "holding people able." He set us high targets, believed that we could achieve them, and his confidence rubbed off.

What's more, he modeled accountability himself. He was highly visible in his own contributions, but also disarmingly honest if he ever failed to deliver. He encouraged us to be open about our mistakes – like my failure with the fuel gauge – and to learn from them. According to influential author Fred Kiel, too many leaders see that as a show of weakness, when it's really "… a sign of tremendous strength."

An Authentic Leader

More than anything, John was real. He shared stories from outside work, took part in social events, and leveled with us whenever he could. Leadership coach Bruna Martinuzzi says that. "… without authenticity or integrity a leader has no credibility."

And fellow podcast guest Frances Frei, from Harvard Business School, says that authenticity creates valuable trust within teams. "You're more likely to trust me if you get a sense that I am really in it for you and for the broader group."

That was certainly true with John. We weren't friends with him (even if we'd been rescued on his motorbike!). He was still our boss. But we all saw his empathic and supportive behavior in action. It brought us together as a team – firmly behind him as our leader.

Put Your Leadership to the Test

I've known other great leaders since John (and some not-so-great ones!). When I think about the best of the bunch, the same defining characteristics keep coming up: humility, consistency, accountability, authenticity. And, perhaps more than anything, the willingness to listen to someone in their moment of need, and the instinct to offer the right kind of help.

So Rachel's podcast guests chime with my own experiences. They've also given me ways to lift my own leadership skills. I recommend you have a listen, too, to better understand the people who lead you – and maybe raise your own game.

But if you do want to impress me as a leader, you'll always have to pass my "motorbike test."

If I phoned you after hours from a dark roadside, how would you respond?

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What Makes a Great Leader? Have Your Say!

Which personal characteristics are crucial for leaders? What is it about the best leaders that makes people want to follow them? Please share your experiences, insights and tips, below.

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Then I talked to Captain Mark Brouker, a former commanding officer at one of the largest naval hospitals in the world. He told me that the fundamentals of good leadership are the same the world over, in every conceivable setup.

Leadership Fundamentals

"At the end of the day, it's all about trust," he says. Whether you run a hospital, a community group, or a multinational corporation – the best way to build trust is to show that you care.

In his acclaimed new book, "Lessons from the Navy: How to Earn Trust, Lead Teams, and Achieve Organizational Excellence," Mark Brouker outlines six critical leadership behaviors that may challenge preconceptions about the armed forces.

Compassion is the secret weapon in any leader's arsenal, Mark Brouker believes. When you truly care about your people – get to know them and try to help – strong bonds of trust develop. With trust comes loyalty and a willingness to go the extra mile. And perhaps most importantly, a greater sense of well-being.

Intimidating Leaders

Near the start of Brouker's book, he makes the point that leadership always comes with some level of intimidation, and this can hinder building trust.

"By definition, leaders are kind of intimidating, because they dictate whether you have a job, frankly," says Brouker. "They dictate how much pay you're going to get. They have an enormous amount of power over you. And I think most leaders don't appreciate that level of natural intimidation."

The opposite of intimidation is being approachable, he says, and if we don't work on this proactively, we'll "default to intimidation" and create a culture of fear.

Listen Well

Brouker's book is full of tips that nurture approachability, and many of them depend on that most underused of leadership skills – listening.

"Listening is the ultimate way to show respect, because you're conveying: 'I value what you have to say. I may not agree, we may not go in that direction. But I'm going to listen, I'm going to analyze it, and I'm going to value what you have to say.' It's extremely powerful," he reflects.

He offers a memorable tool that anyone can use, leader or not. Whoever you're with, think of the acronym WAIT, which is short for "Why am I talking?"

You may be saying something important. In which case, fine. Or you may be missing an opportunity to listen instead, with all of its related benefits – like understanding your co-workers and building trust.

One place you can listen is wherever your people work. Brouker advocates simply walking around. Or, in the time of COVID-19, checking in by phone and video call.

Never forget, "You're trying to become approachable," he says. So smile, thank people for what they do, ask how you can help, and, of course, listen.

But displaying compassion is not without potential pitfalls. Some leaders might worry they come across as weak. Others may find themselves overpromising, telling people that everything's going to be OK when serious issues need attention.

Optimism Vs Realism

I asked Brouker how he marries optimism and realism. A positive outlook is good for morale, but glossing over problems hardly builds trust. He answered with a story about a big naval hospital in Bethesda, Maryland, where he was giving a talk on the value of optimism.

"Someone said, 'The parking here is a mess. You can't find a parking spot… How do you put a smile on your face on that?'" he recalls.

"And I said, 'Well, here's what I would say: welcome onboard the naval hospital Bethesda. We have a great team here. We work with the army. The Harvard president comes here. The congressmen and women come here. Great case mix complexity. The bad news is parking's terrible! You're going to have to get here early. Put on a good pair of shoes, get an umbrella, and call it a little physical fitness for you.' So, address the elephant in the room, but don't let it hijack the conversation."

We can be realistic and optimistic, Brouker believes, if we listen to people's problems and engage with solutions. It's respectful, it helps to build trust, and ultimately, it shows that we care.

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I haven't seen the inside of an office for a year. I haven't seen most of my colleagues for over a year – at least not face-to-face. Some of them I've never even met IRL (in real life). And, as a result, the relationships that I have with them and, in particular, with my manager, have changed irrevocably.

Are Our Relationships With Managers Stronger or Weaker?

In some ways, I feel closer to my co-workers and manager than I did before. After all, we've lived through a pandemic together.

Some of them have even caught COVID – luckily, they've been fine. Some of us have had to juggle work with homeschooling or caregiving responsibilities. Many of us have found the last year a serious mental and emotional strain.

At other times, I feel like my work relationships have become weaker. Sometimes now, if I do have an issue, I simply don't bring it up. It seems silly or bothersome to have to book in a Teams meeting just to chat about the small things – like not knowing how to start a new blog!

I know that my manager wouldn't mind if I did call him up. And yet, going through that rigmarole seems so much more cumbersome than, say, tapping him on the shoulder for a quick catch-up, which is what I used to do when we worked in the office together.

What Do You Want From Your Managers?

As employees, we've had a whole new set of problems to contend with. So have the managers we look to for guidance.

Challenges range from the practical, day-to-day issues of, "My internet is down, so I can't log in for our call," to the more difficult and emotional – such as, "I'm struggling to homeschool and work at the same time," or, "I'm feeling really isolated because I've been shielding for months."

We wanted to hear what you're looking for from your manager in 2021 – and how your needs have changed over the past year. So we asked our friends and followers on social media to give us their top tips.

Stronger Leadership

Interestingly, many people flagged the need for stronger leadership from managers. Facebook friend Ricardo Guereca put it simply: "Authoritative!"

Ruth-Ann Soodeen echoed this sentiment in our Career Community Facebook group, revealing that she wanted a manager "who leads rather than manages." And Twitter follower Arif Maghrib said he needed one who "... can keep us smiling, if not laughing, among worldwide increases in cases of coronavirus."

These comments suggest that it's no longer enough for managers to simply do the basics – organizing and delegating work. They also need to be a motivational and positive force that drives people forward. Something that has no doubt been incredibly difficult to achieve – but more important than ever – over the past year.

More Flexibility

Although lots of businesses have been quick to get on board with flexible and virtual working, many are still struggling.

As Janice Mason, who belongs to our Career Community group on Facebook, hinted: "I need my manager to understand the benefits of home working!"

LinkedIn follower Tracy (Guzman) Price echoed this, but explained that being flexible isn't always about the practical elements of work. It's also about providing emotional support to people living through an unpredictable and often scary time.

Tracy wrote: "2020 is gone, and 2021 is hot on its heels! I feel the manager I need right now sees me as a whole person. [Even if you] put politics and racial unrest aside, the pandemic by itself has placed an incredible amount of stress on people. It has changed the way we do business, whether you've gone virtual or remained open and had to wear PPE and stand behind plexiglass... it's different.

"Add in having to deal with customers and clients who have become sad, scared and angry – even the nicest of employees can become frustrated, fed up and exhausted. It's just hard.

"Managers have to be flexible in their style and meet the employees where they are at. That may be different from day-to-day or moment-to-moment."

What do you need from your managers, and how have your needs changed since last year? Are you getting the right support or leadership? Let us know your thoughts in the Comments section, below.

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Harvard professor Frances Frei and her partner, Anne Morriss, think they've got the answer. They've developed a practical framework for empowerment, based on their work as consultants and as senior executives at leading global companies.

At its heart is the idea that great leaders may not look like leaders at all – the only thing that matters is what they can do for others.

Trust, Love and Belonging

Morriss and Frei share their framework for empowerment in a new book, titled, "Unleashed: the Unapologetic Leader's Guide to Empowering Everyone Around You."

The framework is easy to visualize. It consists of five concentric circles, with each ring representing a different factor that leads to empowerment. The innermost circle is the closest to the leader, the outermost is the furthest away.

At the center is trust, the main foundation for empowering others. "Without trust," Frei says. "You don't get the benefit of the doubt, and things constantly get re-litigated."

Then comes love. This is an unusual context for "love," but Frei argues that "to really unleash someone in the world" is the greatest act of love you can perform for another person.

Belonging comes next. This is where leaders ensure that they truly see and serve everyone around them, no matter how different those people are. Like Frei herself.

The Big Unleash

"I'm a lot," admits Frei. "Because I want to change the world and I call things how I see them. I have gotten advice, I think, at every stage of my life, to smooth the edges, really trim who I am."

And in the beginning, she tried hard to follow that advice. The result?

"It was a disaster! I was terrible at fitting in, and I wasn't nearly as effective as the people who were born that way," she says.

This led to what she calls "the big unleash." She realized she needed to look beyond people's advice – what she calls "prescriptions" – and focus instead on why they were giving it.

"Often our prescriptions are only good for people that are just like us," she reflects. "So I stopped listening to the actual prescriptions and just started feeling [people's] deep devotion to my success. It totally changed my relationship with people and how I felt on the inclusion dial." 

The Inclusion Dial

The "inclusion dial" is another neat schematic you'll find in her book, in the belonging section. It moves through four steps that describe how team members feel on the path to inclusion: safe, welcome, celebrated, and cherished.

These steps are progressive, Frei says, so the order matters. People will only feel welcome once they feel safe. This then leads to celebration, and the final step is when everyone feels cherished – the ultimate in inclusion and a massive boost for an organization.

People often talk about "diversity and inclusion," she adds, but it's better when inclusion comes first. A culture of inclusion often leads to a diverse workforce, and that's not necessarily the case the other way around.

When you get inclusion right, and good leaders unleash the best from their people, organizations thrive. "That's how we're going to get more rigorous decisions," Frei says. "That's how we're going to be able to do things faster. How we're going to be able to do things at higher quality."

Listen to Our Interview With Frances Frei

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What does inclusion mean to you? How can we unleash the best in our people? Let us know what you think in the comments section below.

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